We all want to raise kids that are healthy and successful. Getting caught up in the details of the day-to-day, we can overlook that happiness is often a choice. Even in tough times, we need to push ourselves to be happy. Soon enough, happiness will be natural and a breeze.
I recently sat in a lecture given by a mom who is battling cancer. Her story was heart-wrenching as she talked about her two young children and the realities they face. The thing that most impressed me, though, was her grateful attitude toward each day she had been given. She told the room full of moms that she has a question written above her desk and is reminded daily to answer with a “yes.” She asks herself “Have I enjoyed my children today?” She makes sure that even in the middle of her struggles she takes time out to laugh with her kids. If this mom, very aware that each day could be her last, can savor time with her children each day, how much more can we take time out to smile with our kids?
US News ran an article discussing ways to raise happy children. While much of the article focused on the effect of praise vs. nagging, I appreciated the section of the article discussing how two questions can help make a happier family. Christine Carter, executive director of the Greater Good Science Center at the University of California at Berkeley, said to ask:
1. When are you happiest with your kids?
2. What part of the normal day with your family routinely causes suffering?
After answering these questions, the author recommended ways to reinforce those times of being happiest and then how to make adjustments to the parts that cause suffering to become more enjoyable times. One example she gave was to set aside time each day with each child and find out three good things were that happened that day. This time can be spent cuddling with each kid, or together as a family at the dinner table. Small changes like this have been shown to help kids do better in school and have fewer emotional issues.
Even Fisher Price, the toy company, has a wonderful top ten list of “How to Have a Happy Family.” Number Three on the list is “Happy Families Plan Fun.” What a great reminder that fun doesn’t usually just happen, but created and anticipated. Their list reminds us that a happy family values time together for fun, and results in well-adjusted children.
The very best resource for ideas of things to do to have fun as a family is right in our own homes – ask your kids what they like to do with mom and dad! It’s surprising that their list may be very different than what we expect. (A friend of mine did this recently and found that Disneyland wasn’t even in the top five, but playing in the sprinklers was!)
Here are a couple of ideas, and below, some links to sites with more ideas:
Pillow forts
Playgrounds (and not just to sit and watch the kids play, but to interact with them)
Make paper boats and take them for a float
Play in the sprinklers
Picnic lunch in the park (wanna get crazy? Have a breakfast picnic!)
Museums
Costume parties
Plant a garden
What ideas do you have for family fun?
Image Source: flickr.com/photos/makelessnoise/387562975
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Cool!
This is damn good.
I love it!