Recently, I was having a conversation with parents who I highly respect. They have three kids who are turning out to be amazing little people. Along with this, the parents have a fantastic relationship with each other. I asked them how they pull it all off! They said that raising a responsible family is a huge challenge that it’s important to not lose sight of taking care of each other in the middle of raising kids. As parents, we get so wrapped around the world of our Bitty Bumpkins, and it is easy to overlook the care we used to give to our spouse. One radio talk show host tasks wives to “be your husband’s girlfriend!” and visa versa to the husbands.
With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, particularly with new parents, it is so easy to just bring the little symbol of your love along on a dinner date. They are so cute, and we don’t want to miss a moment with them. (This is really hard advice for me to take as well, as our Cutey Crawler is on the verge of walking and I don’t want to miss those first steps!) But it is vital to not only our relationship with each other as a team raising a tyke, it is also foundational to bringing up a healthy next generation.
As we take care of each other, we strengthen the bond that brought us together in the first place. Many experts recommend a regular “date night” where the kids are not even a topic of conversation. Remembering who that person is we are partnering, with in parenting brings us closer as a couple. It can also bring out the better side when we are allowed to be adults with each other and have time not wrapped up in discipline, homework, and soccer schedules. Every once in a while it is good to get in touch with that side of ourselves. We can better take on the challenges of being a parent when we can take an occasional break from the constant world of kids.
When we take time out to build the relationship with each other, we set a good example for our kids. If they see that raising a family takes work, they will be better prepared for what to expect when they get to that stage in their life. Neither good parenting nor strong partnering just happen like magic. It doesn’t make us bad parents to take time out to build that foundation. So, if at all possible for this Valentine’s Day, get a babysitter, borrow a nanny, drop ‘em off at grandparents, exchange time with other parents to watch each other’s kids…but find the time to spend with just each other!
Image Source: flickr.com/photos/elmoalves/2932572231
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